Nobody Caught Her, But She Has Captured Our Hearts!

SedonaLee Jenay Lynch

 came blasting into this world on June 14, 2019 @ 7:29pm.

7 lbs. 4 oz. of a pure precious gift of life!

 Birth is one of my most favorite things in the entire world.  Lashae and I were honored to be invited into the delivery of my newest Grand and Lashae's first niece.  This has been the 13th birth I have been privileged to attend. I say that because I am very aware that each birth is different and beautiful and amazing EVERY SINGLE TIME!!  No matter how these babies get here, each story is special and unique, just like them.

Charsie's birth story was beautiful with a few twists and bad turns and a perfect outcome! 

 PRAISE BE TO GOD!!

 Charsie labored like a champ.  She was a "natural" thru the entire thing.  We talked a lot about birth and labor and she has attended a few and was feeling prepared before her big day, and was ready to embrace the experience.  

We have a family with a lot of women and a lot of babies and we love to talk and text all things labor and delivery all the time.  She was as prepared as any first time mom can be.

  Charsie labored like a pro.

  She was a textbook laboring Mama.  Everything progressed and went like the best case scenario birth story.  Lashae and I and Jesse, and of course Charsie, listened to music and laughed and prayed and breathed thru the whole thing.  Charsie walked and bathed and rocked and rolled and did it all with a smile/ grimace (depending on the contractions)  and was very calm and quiet, taking it as it came.  

See the laboring Mama in the tub!  :)

As things progressed and she was feeling ready to be done with this whole process and anxious to hold her baby in her arms and not in her body, we asked the Dr. to come in and break her water, as that usually is the beginning of the end.  We were informed that there would be no time to break Charsie's water as the Dr. had another delivery she was attending too.  It was probably the next contraction or 2 and Charsie's water broke naturally on its own.  We were thrilled and excited about that progress and how her body was just moving right along without the need for any assistance.  We laughed a little that she was sticking even closer to the natural plan than she intended. :)

 A few more contractions hit and you could tell things had changed and were getting intense and she was locked and loaded to push baby out into this world.  Charsie was getting tired and ready for her work day (labor) to be OVER!  We finally got news that the Dr. was finished with delivery and was on her way; she came in the room and we were all taking positions to help Charsie push this baby out when we were informed by the Dr. that she had a C-Section that was going to take priority over Charsie and her baby. We all melted!  But then the Dr. informed us that there is a mid-wife on duty and she could catch this baby, if need be.  We all rejoiced!!!!  We asked to meet the midwife and thought let's get this show on the road.  The midwife was so kind and just perfect for catching this baby .....but, you could tell there had been some sort of hallway conversation/power struggle about who was gonna catch this baby.  Everyone was very professional  but very very very "hands off" and "closed lipped".  We were so confused and trying to trust the system in place, but when you are in the intense part of labor  (whether Mama or support crew) you just resort to submitting to anyone in authority who may know more than you.  You always want the best outcome for mama and baby so you follow their expertise and assume they know something you don't.  We watched  Charsie decline...her contractions began to get further and further apart, she was losing hope and losing all control of her body that had worked so well for her.  She was getting sick and tired!  She was puking and falling asleep (during contractions!!!!! - with NO MEDS). 

 I had never seen anything like it.  When the Dr. got done with C-Section she came back and we again got in position, and then she left again...Lashae and I knew without words exchanged that this was going in the WRONG direction.  

  It was a survival instinct that kicked in that wasn't a decision or a discussion but an instinct of helping the innocent child and suffering Mama.  I grabbed Charsie's head and looked her dead in the eye and said YOU NEED TO PUSH THIS BABY OUT!!!  Lashae grabbed a leg and said PUSH and she spoke with all the authority and confidence that Charsie had been looking for from the professionals for hours!!!!!  For the first time, you could see Charsie gain some hope again, that this could be over soon.   She felt what a real push felt like and it gave her hope that she could do this and was almost at the finish line.  The nurse told Charsie to pant thru the next contraction because the Dr. was busy on a phone call with an emergency and Charsie said TOOOOOOOO #$@%^*&^% BAD!!!!  She pushed that baby out in one solid CrossFit push.

  Nobody caught the baby.

  Lashae had a leg and I was by Charsie's head on the other side.....and when the baby's head came out, a nurse saw it, and started yelling WE HAVE A HEAD IN HERE, before she could finish the sentence the whole entire baby came out at once.

Nobody caught the baby.

Whatever the power struggle or phone call was all about came to an abrupt halt when NOBODY caught that baby.  As soon as the nurse yelled head, there was a team of people there to clean up the mess that was made.  It was a mess. Charsie had pushed with a lot of power and no control.  There was blood and snot and tears flying from every end of Charsie and everyone on her team.  It all came out and was sewed back together....by the mighty GRACE of  God!!!

I'm not giving names of anyone, I don't want to hurt anyone's career or reputation even though we have all suffered some PTSD over the situation.  Lashae and I have both woke up multiple times in the night not being able to breathe and feeling nauseous.  We are so thankful for the outcome, but we are traumatized by what "could have happened" and "how could I have prevented the blowout".  I have prayed about how to handle this whole thing that won't turn a beautiful birth story into a root of bitterness.  I have decided to tell the story with truth and thanksgiving with Charsie's permission and encouragement without giving names, because it's bigger than the names or individuals in this birth story.  

 The lessons I'm learning to a greater degree is trusting GOD, even when it's over and we made it thru but I wake up and feel like I can't breathe I have to trust that God never left us.  I have to trust that God saw us losing ground and hope and He gave Charsie the strength to push that baby out in one push. I can't get hung up on what went wrong and thank God for what went right and thank God that the Dr. came in and stitched things up with great care in repairing the damage.

 I also learned that when we are helping people, no matter what our position or title is or isn't, we can't worry about people's feelings and power and authority over what we know is right and wrong.  We must respect authority, but if we know there is something right and something wrong we must discern it, and do what we know to be right even if it steps on every toe and ego and title in the whole world.  We have to get over ourselves and our fear of man and help people when they are vulnerable and can't help themselves! 

 The last and best lesson is for THE CHURCH, 

(some people may not get what I'm saying, I'm speaking Christianese).

It takes THE BODY to help birth new life and support the ones laboring.  We weren't designed to do it on our own.  Individuals are designed to endure things that are hard; even when we are strong and healthy and things are going well, but it takes THE BODY to support a person and to usher in new life.  

We must give the person that is laboring hard, support and clear direction when they can't see the goal, we must continue to give encouragement when they want to quit!!!  We can't depend only on professionals and science and coping techniques to help the laboring and usher in new life.  

We need THE BODY to help each other and encourage each other and get into the mess thru the entire process, even when it is scary and unsure.  We need to stand beside one another thru the hard parts of life and speak up for those that are in the middle of pain and suffering and be brave to get in each other's business, at every end, and yell to all that will listen

 PUSH THRU WITH ALL YOU'VE GOT AND WE WILL CATCH WHATEVER AND WHOEVER COMES OUT OF THIS!