Change Brings New and Old Reactions.

The question was asked:  

Why, after so much time has passed, after a history of trauma, do people still struggle?

 Why do certain things, like change, trigger old and awful responses?

Adjustment can be difficult for everyone – even good changes – wanted changes – needed changes, are difficult.

Ask any newlywed (who is truthful) how easy and comfortable and fun new marriage is?!?!

Even though it is a wonderful time with all the benefits and blessings of marriage, it sucks for the most part, for most of the people. 

It's a big change and adjustment.

So making a move can trigger anybody into crazy behaviors.

Cellie, our baby who happens to be 3 and has hated food for most of her life, decided stress-eating was her way of handling the move.

We were all taken back when we couldn’t keep the kid out of the pantry.  Usually, we have to bribe and threaten her to eat, and now all of a sudden we are having to lock her out of the pantry. 

 Change does weird things to all of us.

I was discouraged with some of the old behaviors that the move triggered.  I felt like we had crossed this particular bridge or jumped this certain hurdle and it was back to that same ‘ole familiar reaction.  It comes and goes, but it is something I had hoped would go and never come back.

I didn’t really know how to answer the question:

HOW LONG AFTER TRAUMA, DO TRIGGERS STILL SET US OFF?

God answered that question for me, with an unpleasant experience this morning.

I was on a morning run, and enjoying the new route, new view, and beautiful weather, all was right in my world.  THEN, I a heard a dog coming at me,  I couldn’t see him but I could hear him barking and running towards me,  it triggered this crazy response in me, and I screamed and jumped right into a very busy road, away from the direction the dog was coming.  I reacted before I could think.  My heart was instantly at heart-attack rate.  Once I could see the dog, I could see that he was behind a very secure fence and his owner was pretty disgusted with my dramatic reaction.  I felt stupid for having jumped in the road and screaming, but it just happened all at once and I didn’t even think about it, I just reacted. 

The last time I got bit by a dog (because it has happened a couple different times in my running history) it has been well over 15 years ago.  Something about all the changes, new route, new dogs, new territory, I obviously was triggered into a response that I have not had for a long time, and didn’t know was still in me.  The first dog bite that I had so many years ago, is healed with just a little scar remaining. Somehow all the changes triggered old fears and responses that made me react as if I had been bitten yesterday.

Once I got passed that dog and the heart rate went down a bit, I could move forward and realize how ridiculous my reaction was.  I couldn’t prepare because I didn’t know it was coming…the dog or the reaction.

  Even if that dog was coming to bite me; screaming and jumping into traffic was NOT helpful to anyone.  For people that know kids with trauma in their past, that struggle to understand, why triggers still set off responses that make no sense and are not helpful to anyone, I’m here to testify……THEY ARE NOT THINKING ABOUT IT, IT’S NOT PERSONAL, IT’S A REFLEX RESPONSE THAT NOBODY ENJOYS.  At least for me, I could move on pretty quickly and finish my run, as if nothing had happened today.  I think the same for kids with trauma…the further they are from it, even though they may respond to triggers, they can quickly recover and move on! 

I guess my answer to the question of how long will it take to get over a history of trauma is this:

The reaction may always be there when triggers are pulled, but the recovery time is much faster and the regular rhythms of life return faster and easier over time. 

 Praise God for healing, even if we live with scars we can live and move and handle life and change beyond trauma and triggers.

Psalm 103:2-5 New Living Translation (NLT)

2 

Let all that I am praise the Lord;

    may I never forget the good things he does for me.

3 

He forgives all my sins

    and heals all my diseases.

4 

He redeems me from death

    and crowns me with love and tender mercies.

5 

He fills my life with good things.

    My youth is renewed like the eagle’s!