God's Grand Gifts and Grace.

Extremes – Intense

We are feeling all the feels around here.  We have just been blessed with the most amazing

 GRAND

set of twins. 

 We could not be happier and so very thankful for the timing of our move so that we can be a part of these precious lives from day 1. 

 For some crazy reason when I feel overwhelmed by the goodness of God, it can throw me clear to the other extreme and throw me into this weird cycle of fear.  I want to clench my hands and heart and hang on with everything I've got.  It’s like being scared it’s all too good to be true, or knowing that such sweet times are only part of the story and so instead of being present and enjoying the moment, I often slip into the

 “what if”

mindset..

What if we had missed this? What if we mess up?

What if things fall apart?

To live in the “what if” is not to live in the present or the grace of today.

I have been listening to a series on a podcast from Grace Gate and it has truly been a game changer and life saver for me in this intense time.   

I have all these feelings and it feels so intense and extreme and it makes me think I’m a little on the crazy side. 

*Do not comment.*

We have had so many changes and such highs and lows with this move.

We are so happy happy happy about being near family (yay).

We are so sad that Charlie hasn’t got to come yet (boo).

We are happy to be doing new things and meeting new people (yay).

We are missing our friends and our place in Oregon (boo).

We are loving the conveniences of city living (yay).

We are hating living in town (boo).

We are enjoying our new church with all the bells and whistles (yay).

We are missing our sweet and intimate fellowship in Oregon (boo).

The list is endless……..

The biggest high is that God put me just 2 miles away from my new twin GRANDS.  I get to pop in and out without interrupting the flow of their family bonding that is going on so beautifully.

I have noticed that Lashae is a complete rock-star at handling her new little bundles, but sometimes she just needs a few extra hands.  I pray she gets double the oxytocin because it is survival at this point.  I, on the other hand, have oxy-nothing.  I told my hubby I may need some oxy intervention at some point, and so he took that request and warning, and they prayed at prayer meeting that I would have the strength of an ox.

 That seems to be working! 

I have a hard time explaining to people that ask…..

Why did you move? 

 In our culture, it is important to put finances and kids and sports and work and education as your reason for everything…we moved because we felt God led us this way.

 Here are a few of the benefits and confirmations of God's gracious leading and the good good gifts He gives.

.

Happy Birthday To Luke - The Cream Filling!

Happy Birthday Luke!  

Luke is the true middle of the family; the sweetest of all, the cream filling in the oreo.

 This kid is the most balanced kid in the whole family!  This kid is the same everyday.  Right now in the midst of so many changes in our family, I depend on this kid and his steady solid ways, more than ever.

  I honestly could not handle life right now without the consistency and companionship and help of this kid. 

 I appreciate everything about you Luke Franke Brewer.

 Luke is strong and funny, and smart!

 Luke is a team player and a brother and friend to many.

 Luke is not only the middle child, he is the middle of the brothers.

Luke can fit in to any situation or crowd, and he never changes, he doesn't conform. 

 He is the same everywhere he goes and to everyone he encounters. 

God knew exactly what He was doing when He put this kid together and then placed him right in the middle of this crazy family...he is like the eye of the storm, the calm and the quiet.

6 Week Check-Up

It’s been 6 weeks today, since the big move.

I figured that’s a good time to do a little check-up, or check-in with how everyone is doing.

Whenever you give birth, have surgery, or break a bone 6 weeks seems like a big marker for a check up on how things are healing and settling into the new norm.

A couple things stand out to me; the areas that we thrived in before, we still thrive, the areas we struggled, we still struggle.

Joy filled people are happy and strugglers struggle.

Moving does not create anything; it just rearranges and brings to light what was already there.

It’s a little like cleaning behind the fridge or stove, you don’t know what it really behind there until you MOVE it.

I think any kind of change or move or pressure just brings to the surface more readily what is in a person. 

Pressure is what brings out character.

So needless to say I think we have all found some stuff that can use some clean-up in our character, and some stuff that makes us feel like we are in better shape than we realized.

We were praying for clarity while Charlie was in Uganda and the only thing that is clear is that he in not moving here super soon.  We are bummed about that, but we also are thankful that God make it clear and we trust Him, so we will just keep asking Him to show us the way and walk in it.

There are a couple of advantages to living life apart with married visitations (wink); we are super intentional with our time together as a couple and a family. You know when you only have a few days, to not waste any of it.  The funny thing is, our usual definition of not wasting time, is to go faster and fit in as much as possible.

 We have learned to slow down and savor each moment.

I have realized thru this move that I have lived a big portion of my life pretty much unconscious or at least on auto-pilot.  The things I do, and the places I go, have been pretty much the same over the years.  There would be seasonal changes and a new baby, or adoption, or marriage to celebrate but even thru all the changes, so many things remained the same for me.

 

I have had to pay closer attention these days, wake up and think thru everything.  So, while my brain and GPS feel exhausted at the end of most days, it’s been good to wake-up and learn to be more intentional with each day.

This move is full of new territory and character building opportunities.

Romans 5:3-5 New Living Translation (NLT)

3 We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. 4 And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.5 And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

Jumping In With Everything We've Got

Matthew 14:29-31 English Standard Version (ESV)

29 He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.” 31 Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”

John 21:7 English Standard Version (ESV)

7 That disciple whom Jesus loved therefore said to Peter, “It is the Lord!” When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on his outer garment, for he was stripped for work, and threw himself into the sea.

I have always wondered why Peter would put on his clothes to jump in the water….I know people study this and the history and the culture, but I have always thought it was a bit out of character given the impulse of Peter.  I mean jumping in the water is totally in his character, but to put his robe on first, seems like an extra step.  

I was texting a friend who went through a very hard trial many years ago and she wasn’t super proud of how she reacted at the time.  Now, as if history is repeating itself, they are facing the exact same trial again. 

I have had this happen in my life many times.  I get through something by the grace of God, and I learn a million lessons that I hope to never have to put into practice and then, sure enough, I circle back to the same thing 

AGAIN.

You begin to look at yourself….and think, ok, I’m the common denominator here….how in the world did this happen AGAIN? 

 Why do I have to be part of the same mess again, in similar situations, different people, different setting, same trial.  

I think this is what Peter was doing when He realized it was Jesus on that shore.  He wasn’t going to take any chances; he jumped in dressed and ready for anything.  He didn’t know if he was going to walk on water, or run, or fly, or swim, and he didn’t care, he wasn’t going to let the opportunity pass him by.  The first time he jumped out of the boat he panicked and sunk and got a little talking to by Jesus.  The second time, he jumped and swam and got a little breakfast with Jesus, which led to a grace-filled, private conversation with Jesus.

May we let the Lord use every trial and especially the ones we get to revisit over and over, to fill us with more grace and draw us closer to Him, no matter how we get there.

May He use our experiences, through failures and successes for His glory.

LORD, HELP US TO JUMP IN WITH EVERYTHING WE HAVE,  AND EVERYTHING WE HAVE BEEN THRU  TO GET CLOSER TO YOU, BECAUSE WE ARE WILD ABOUT YOU.

God's Perfect Timing

A question that has sparked a lot of prayer and conversation over the years has been

*If you didn’t have to worry about money or time what would you do?*

The truth is that God our Father is in charge of time and money, so technically we don’t have to worry about it.

Most of us can’t even get past the money factor to even consider the time part of the conversation.

God has worked on me and worked on me with the “money” portion of this topic.  I don’t claim to have it conquered but I have experienced His faithfulness and provision in small things and huge ways that I can’t deny.

  One example that happened years ago, when God was really getting in my heart over His daily bread, His constant and faithful provision, that may seem so small to some, but I will never forget it.  We were broke and it was going to be a few more days before payday….I was at a sports event with the kids and the whole time I was there I was thinking about how I had no dinner plan and I didn’t have the money to stop in town and feed everyone. 

 I literally said out loud as we were walking back to the car….Lord, we are going to need you to make dinner tonight.  

I kid you not, I walked in the door of our house and there lay on the counter a whole bag full of fresh and warm and gorgeous tamales.  They had been delivered by a friend, for no particular reason and no warning.  Only God and I knew of our earlier conversation!

 

So now God seems to be hot on my trail to teach me some truths and give me some very personal experiences about His perfect timing. 

  

I have been in awe of His faithfulness in the timing of our move and all the details that go with such a big change.

Charlie is on his way home from Uganda and one of our biggest prayers during this trip is that God would give us some clarity on some decisions we have in the works.  The biggest part of the decisions seems to be about “timing”. 

 When I pray I often go over in my mind how God has timed some things so perfectly and personally I can’t help but to be encouraged and reminded again that He has us all in His plan and His time. 

Then the Lord did a fun thing the other day, just to show me AGAIN of His faithfulness.

I went on a run, and at the last minute decided to take a new route and swing on by Lashae’s house and surprise the Grands and get a drink of water.

When I walked up the steps to their house, I could see Lashae sitting at the kitchen table on her phone.

I knocked on the door and she started cracking up when she saw me.

I was confused as to what she was laughing about and she said she was sitting there texting me and pushed “send” on the text and she heard the knock.

Her text was to me, and it said….Becklee has spilled a glass of water; now what am I supposed to do?

  She was being funny and serious at the same time.  She wasn't super excited about getting her twin pregnant body down on the floor to clean a spill. 

It was a fun reminder that God’s timing is always perfect in the small details and the big things and He has a really fun sense of humor. 

I guess if He cares enough to have me on Lashae’s doorstep over a spilled glass of water,  and He can time the sun to rise and set at the perfect time everyday….He can have us where we need to be right on time, every time!

It may feel like complete chaos at times, but it's Him teaching us to look at Him, and trust Him not what we see, and not our own wisdom.

Psalm 27:13-14 English Standard Version (ESV)

13 

I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord

    in the land of the living!

14 

Wait for the Lord;

    be strong, and let your heart take courage;

    wait for the Lord!

His plan and His ways are always better and always worth the waiting.